eliza_

Next week, I finally get to see AJ which is wonderful. A long distance relationship is difficult at best; I don’t think any two people can have more difficult schedules to work around. Of all the men I’ve dated, I’d have to say he’s the one. I guess everyone thinks that about their current significant other; but it isn’t always true. I just know what my head, my heart and my gut tell me. I am the luckiest girl in the world when it comes to romance.

Work, that’s another story. I adore Joss; I would never change this experience for anything. With all the joy that comes with acting, there is an equal amount of stress as a producer. I wasn’t the only one disappointed with the poster; thank God there is a new one.

The website was re-launched with a more inviting look, and the trailer is wicked. Reshooting the pilot was a smart move allowing us to pull in the audience quicker. There continue to be script problems, but those were resolved and we were on set last week, that’s with the good.

If there is anything consistent with this show is change. I have to admit that it pisses me off that there are already websites to save Dollhouse. Gives me that slayer walking into the cemetery without a stake and 100 vamps are about to rise. Creepy, I’m sure you’ve all felt it. Back to the change part, we have a new air date, Friday, Feb. 13. Four years ago it was the date Angel was cancelled. I’m taking it as a good sign.

The thing scaring me most right now, meeting his mom. We’re spending Thanksgiving together. Wish me luck on that one.

Our new puppy, which AJ hasn’t met yet, Echo, I had to do it, likes the computer so much that she’s figured out how to turn off the wireless. She turned it off when I was on this week, and here I thought my wireless was down. So if I pop off it’s her, she doesn’t like my being on the computer and barks at my dad and brothers. She’s a spitfire, just like me, but when I take her out, she gets all shy.

Much love to MH and teh J, Shan and everyone I’ve missed. Work has been crazy. I should be around now. I have figured out which button to push when she’s turned off the internet.

I’ve missed you guys.

E

I suck at subjects, but right now I feel I'm sucking at everything. Working is kicking my ass. I love it, don't get me wrong, it's wonderful; now there is someone one in my life and having to deal with working over him just sucks a whale's penis. No not something even I'd want to do.

The holidays are fast approaching, for me they start in October, I love Halloween, then Thanksgiving and Christmas. But with the time, many studios have short Christmas hiatus, which in our case (premiering in Jan.) puts us at a disadvantage, we have to have enough footage in the can for a certain number of episodes. Now with more ordered rather than the original 11 and the pilot (retooled so the original pilot will be aired as the second episode)makes for long hours to get everything before the November holidays start.

I need sleep, and more than that I need to be in AJ's arms. I'm too tired to go all sappy, tired and in a horrible mood. All of that is just for starters.


I've taken tomorrow night off, since I have to travel next week and will be out-of-the country, so I can spend sometime with AJ, then possibly fly back to him Saturday the 11th.

I shouldn't even be updating as my mood is so horrible. Just thinking of him makes me smile.

~ Bitchy Eliza

I’ve got to learn to get my voice. Yes, I have a voice, I’m not talking literally here, or maybe I am. When I saw the poster markup, my gut told me it didn’t do it. For me it doesn’t. The PR poster for ‘Dollhouse,’ just doesn’t cut it. It resembles Faith in a coma from ‘Buffy’, or Tru on a mortician’s slab in ‘Tru Calling’. As much as Joss has championed it, I really hate it. I’m usually ‘go-with-the-flow’ gal but this is where I have to find my voice whatever that voice is going to be.

I don’t mind the extra work producing involves; truthfully I love it. Being on the cusp of breaking back more television to television is important to me. The ‘remote free tv’ campaign is long overdue. When you look at the time spent on commercials, it’s just ridiculous. Yes, you can make good quality television (depending on how you define that) in any time slot, but lately it seems that it’s more about the commercial and the same commercial repeated over and over. I’ll stop my diatribe, for now anyway.

With the prequel, it’s taken all of my spare time I thought I’d have before we started shooting. Actually, AJ takes all of my spare time, which isn’t a bad thing. I wish I were around him more. Just when it seems like we can spend time together, I’m called to the set. Anything worth having is worth working for and as much trouble as juggling schedules can be, I find myself so much happier these days. Being around him I’ve found I keep this goofy grin on my face I hadn’t noticed before.

Late happy birthday, Tomo; sorry I wasn’t around to hassle you, but I’m sure the boys had fun with ya. What is this one? 52? Damn you look good for your age.

I can’t believe MH and J are getting married in what a week? Damn!

Suddenly he’s here in my life; a very quiet entrance for someone use to wowing the crowd. He’s such a different person when he’s out of the ring or maybe it’s what we bring out in each other. Fuck if I know.

I’m his; that sounds so damn funny to me that I’d be writing those words about anyone, but I can. It feels as if we’ve been together for longer when it’s actually been like a minute? I’ve fallen into the like and fallen hard. It’s a lot like …; I’m not even going to use the word to complete that sentence; I don’t want to jinx this with him. I’ve been out with a few guys here, three to be exact? I even slept with one, but nothing compares to this. Never in a million years did I imagine you could fall for someone just by his words.

Funny thing is he doesn’t expect me to be anything other than who I am. AJ promises to catch me when I fall; instead we’ve caught each other. What a wonderful feeling, I wish I could bottle it.

MH, you’ve got to meet him, you’d approve.

Christina, you were right.

Baby, Billy Joel is rocking out on the radio and the song is so true. It really hasn’t happened for the longest time. I’m going to get all sappy here, so I’ll stop for now. And I have been a fool for lesser things, but not anymore.

E

Always the bitch, sometimes the pimp:

A handsome, dark-eyed new friend of mine seeks female companionship. Has been house-trained, and attitude adjusted. An admitted bastard and asshole, he does have a sweet side; give this one a chance. Call: 1-800SpankTomo milicevic rocks

I'm on my way to the Garden State. There is a particular rare plant that I want in my own garden. It might just be a myth; I have to find out.

Interesting what the difference twenty-four hours can make in your mood. Today I feel fuckin’ amazing. Not sure how long the feeling will last, but I certainly will enjoy this while it lasts. Imagine the world, if you could bottle this type of feeling. Most people would sell it I guess; maybe if I had it I’d get greedy, hey I’m a greedy bitch, just not with money. Regardless, I think I’d give it away. But then the real question, if you had it all the time, would you treasure that wonderful feeling or would it become something that you took for granted? As for me, I like that feeling of bliss, an addiction that I totally enjoy. So I shouldn’t say addiction, that’s not it, and if I tried to explain I doubt anyone would understand, not that they have to. It’s like working out, getting that wonderful high you remember after a long absence from the gym.

I met some new people in chat, and IM last night. Got to know things about them I never would have guessed in a million; that’s fuckin’ awesome. Sad more people didn’t come to chat. You need to spam DJ for me. Yeah, and send him food! I’ve been craving donuts too for some odd reason.

To the people I haven’t had the chance to meet, “hello,” I haven’t been around as much as I’d like.

Work, it’s wicked, so much more than I expected. Being a mid-season replacement that will be what kills us, or possibly it’ll be the thing that makes us. Just as long as we aren’t up against LOST; I’ll be a happy girl. Yes, Evi, I admitted it publically.

The success of Dr. Horrible (Yes a musical with Neil Patrick Harris and Nathon Fillion; www.whedon.com ) has convinced Joss that we should do webcasts between our episodes to fill in the blanks and give the fans more. But that’s Joss. I’m learning more about producing, watching these guys is invaluable.

Usually I hate errands, but today not so much, color me happy.

Things with Joss are crazy; he’s such a perfectionist. He’s usually pretty frank with me about things, even though there is a brand new crew at Fox, to say we were burned with Buffy is quite an understatement, as only one of the actors on that show things didn’t affect me quite as much, I wasn’t a regular on the series, Faith was only suppose to be a short stint and look how that worked out. He’s still hesitant.

It’s not quite totally back to the drawing board, but the execs aren’t happy, and as proud as we were with the pilot, Joss writes from that dark noir place in which he seems to live. So you guessed it, we’re reshooting it. The new script will help the audience make some of the leaps that are missing. I guess it goes back to the fundamental question do you write to those who can and will make those intuitive leaps or to those who don’t. Regardless, both Joss and the network feel we need a different pilot. Good news is, the pilot, ‘Echo,’ which by the way is the name of the doll I play, will be the second episode. But then the only thing that is constant is change, right?

I apologize for not being around more, but between that and the flu I seem not to be getting over, I’m staying a bit house bound right now. I really don’t want to give it to anyone. So color me bored as freaking hell.

I have to give props to my girl Christina. First of all, she’s one of the sweetest people you’ll ever meet, and if you haven’t seen Penelope, you most should. Yes, it’s a chick flick, but the message is great, hey if it can affect me, it should appeal to most people.

Speaking of my posse or, my bitches, and you know you want to be one, I have to tell everyone to hit up Lea. She is rocks. She’s a girl after my own heart. It’s good to see her happy.

Now speaking of happy, color J mister can’t wait to married. He’s so damn cute, and I mean that in an engaged type of way. Cause we all know he’s drop dead gorgeous. Most people don’t know Tim the way I do, and by that I mean I know his heart. I’ve known him for a while now, we both went through some shit before we got here, and I know his love is true and he’s happy. I’m glad to see him with a great guy. Good to hear how happy Shan and Ville are as well, gives me a bit of hope; has to be someone out there for everyone.

The doc has ordered me to keep the bed rest, no calls to Joss, or working for the next few days, so I’ll be offline for the next few days anyway. I don’t need the press calling me anorexic when I’m not keeping anything down. Losing more than a pound or two really shows, and I’m looking a bit gaunt.

I’m traveling with Nate, my older brother, I have three by the way; we’ll be gone the latter half of August. We were going to Europe in September, but since my best bud is getting married, I can’t miss it. Now with the reshoot, I’m afraid I’m going to have to cancel my trip as well.

So now you’ve had another boring update from Liza, hopefully I’ll have something more exciting to say in my next update.

Love to my peeps!

E

Well fuck. I’ve always wanted to start out that way, so I did today. I did. Before I forget, if you are talking to me and I disappear, well the medication for the pain makes me throw up. That was my fun yesterday. Jensen is such a sweet distraction, and I appreciate that; particularly when I’m not making sense. Be prepared, until all of this settles down, I’m heavily medicated. Too bad I can’t enjoy it.

So I’m doing random IMs, to people I don’t know. I won’t give you my three for today, but Orlando is very sweet. I’m sure all of you know this, but it was my first time. The second person was busy and I’ve yet to choose a third. But I’m going to meet everyone. If you don’t want to talk, that’s cool as well.

Lea keeps me laughing. Christina who we all know is a love seems to be the voice of reason that I was born without (that’s a good thing); Justin is a sweetheart and single, I think he’s like one of three. Poor thing; he has a choice of all of these women, now who wouldn’t want to be in that situation. I can hear the jokes in my head right now.

Evi, should get her ass her more often. Shy my ass! Laina seems awesome and I hope to get to know her better. Kat, she rocks, I just need to talk to her more often.

So yes, I’m forging the trail down that dark scary pathway that is my fl.

I hope this made sense, I feel the stuff kicking in which is wonderful. It’s hard to walk, until I get walking. I can’t even remember the name it’s so long. But I’m getting relief which is a good thing. Drinking totally zaps any help the meds have, so no more drinking for me for quite a while.

I wanted to watch the Clay fights the other night between Johnny and Orlando, I kept seeing the commercials, and then of course I missed it. I’ve never watched one and I thought this would be a good one to take away my claymation fight virginity.

If you want to IM me before I IM you, that’s cool; if not that’s okay as well.

I don't bite, and if I do, I've had my shots, nothing you can catch. So ....

Tell me one thing about yourself that no one else knows. I'm screening the posts, and I'm not going to black mail you or anything like that. This is just a way to get to know you, if you'd like to get to know me and I you. I'll tell you something as well. You don't have to answer me right away, just whenever you think of some secret you want to share.

Edit: I'll respond in AIM so that your secret(s) remain secret!

Men, can’t live with them, can’t live without them. I adore men. From friendship to lust there is a smorgasbord of options out there when dealing with men. I love to read the comments when a new guy posts verses a new girl. For once the men must feel like meat in a market.

To say I was in heaven tonight, well as close as a girl can get without having sex, reading a playgirl, or eating chocolate. I want to congratulate our men who made the top 100.

Tom, the placement of that hand makes a gal get ideas, even if you only have eyes for someone else in the top 100. It was interesting to see what men felt was sexy. My list would have many of the same men but I’d also have some different ones. But then I don’t think any two lists would be the same.

Hot Men

Want to give a shout out to my girl Lea; she’s definitely in my posse. We’ll be asking you guys to come to LA for a pole party. Yeah Justin, you inspired the idea.

Made you go check out Tom didn’t I? Made ya want to go see who's on that list too. For my next trick I'm going to ...


~Eliza

If you haven’t met Davey, you need to. He’s my princess, so I’ve bought him this lovely frock, Princess Davey

I think it will look cute don’t you? Ever princess has to have his/her fairy goddess mother.

I’m going to start randomly IMing people, so don’t be surprised if you are next, only way to get to know people here.

I’m going to Helsinki to visit Shannon, Jared and MH. I’m going to pamper all three of them.

Sometimes I don’t understand why people can be so mean to each other. I just lost a dear friend, and I’d given anything in the world to have her back, and I didn’t say that for anyone to say, “Oh, I’m sorry, Eliza.” If so than I’m not making my point. Life is so short, there are enough people who will fuck you over, you don’t need your friends help to do that, or for that matter doing it to yourself.

Why is it when you think you have all the answers the questions change?

Youtube, the site is an obsession with some of you, not to mention any names just citing last Friday’s chat and the final three.

Only two of you were meant to understand that one. I’ll admit to watching the drunk animal bits, it’s funny and then there are times that well it can be a bane in ones existence. I’m not going into why I choose to make one movie over another, there has to be something I connect with; that broadens me as an actress.

Yesterday, the headlines went something similar to Eliza Dushku participates in group sex. Hell yes people are flocking to read about it. Can we say misdirection to get people to read an article? Suddenly there is this fever about ‘Sex and Breakfast,’ a movie on DVD now, it’s getting more press now than it did upon release.

You know how it goes; someone put your name into the search – yeah. Personally, at this point, it doesn’t interest me; I’m the main attraction.

Yesterday, it just pissed me off, so to get this today from Nate. My name is the link if you’re interested. Eliza Dushku is playing a high-class…prostitute? It’s right there in black and white. Of course this one was what I’d expected. But of course one link led to another. This one turned out to be an unexpected promo for Dollhouse with the extended trailer and a peak at the pilot. We only finished filming it last Friday, so I’m surprised this is out so soon.

If you're interested, here's the link. Promos

You still owe me, Bones!

PS
http://www.dollverse.com/

Sex! I’d just guess that got your attention. Last night all they could talk about was sex and food, let me fucking hungry and horny. What I wouldn’t give for a wonderful weekend get away with a willing boy toy. I’m being over dramatic, but you get my drift.

Warm beads of sweat meandering down the landscape of a naked body, the tips of my fingers tracing the lines and creases that give a man character, my tongue snake-like in a long … you get the picture. But damn you guys, frustration was my mantra. I’m tired of having an empty space next to me in the bed. And all the millions of places one can take another.

As far as work goes, I love it; I get to really show what I can do, taking on three or four different characters in each episode giving me the opportunity to show all the complexities of each persona, in some ways you could compare it to alas, just with a chick who is physically enhanced and loses her memory after each job. Both Canada and Australia have picked it up. We’re only filming seven episodes, we’d hoped for 11 or 13, but I’m putting my faith in Joss. Mid placements don’t always do well, and as long as they don’t put us up against LOST, I think they’ll pick us up permanently.

The hype is finally out there, and the first trailer, so if you’re interested click here for Dollhouse.

Finally working on some web pages, one for my production company and my personal one. Not much to see yet, and there are some kinks, but its coming together.

MH, how the hell are you? I got your message on my answering machine; it was sweet of you to be so worried. I’m good just too damn busy. I’ve got a package for you; you should get it any day. Know I’m thinking of you, babe. I got to talk to Jared a little, and I can see the connection. I’m glad you’re happy.

To my new favorite person, I lasted all night, you didn’t. You owe me. Get your minds out of the gutter, not that it’s a bad thing, but it’s not what you think.

Everything is coming together with Dollhouse. No easing into this one, Joss is gung-ho, as it were. Amy’s here which is wicked cool, I really don’t know anyone else, but the cast feels strong. With Joss at the helm, we all feel pretty good about things. Producing the show opens so many more opportunities for me, a show doesn’t live forever.

I’ve met some interesting people around here, and was excited to see MH here. Guess that will keep you guessing who it is. We met on a fluke, and just clicked as friends. I have too much fun making him think I’m going to seduce him. He doesn’t swing my way, but he’s a good friend and a girl doesn’t have enough good friends, right?

As busy as I am, which doesn’t help a social life, I’m ready for that one special guy. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy a good fuck, doesn’t everyone? But making love, I’d like to be able to do that too. Seems like every man I’m meeting these days is gay, and there isn’t anything wrong with that. I’m just tired of fuck buddies.

Shannon welcomed me to the madhouse, I had to laugh; my life is a madhouse. Between the movies coming out, and Joss, if you don’t know him he’s a fucking workaholic, pre-production is getting crazy. It’s good for me, keeps me on my toes, and my ass in good shape, he's all about the physicality of female characters. I swear somewhere inside of him is a teenage girl screaming to get out.

I adore the man if you hadn’t noticed. On Sunday’s, when I was on Buffy, we’d go to his house and read the classics aloud, I loved hearing James. I’m keeping my fingers crossed that the tradition continues on ‘Dollhouse’.

Nate’s being weird, but then brothers are a pain.

Things see to be getting to me right now, I think I need a vacation. Does anyone have any ideas?

Or maybe just a drink.

I’m pretty fuckin’ stoked today; it looks like Amy will be joining Dollhouse. She did such a great job on Angel, and we get along so well, she’ll be a good addition.

I’ve been spending a good deal of time with Tim, he’s my MH, don’t ask, cause I won’t tell you what that means. Its good having a friend where can just be and not worry about dealing with a relationship. I need to call James, and see if I can set up a meeting between them, I think it would do Tim a lot of good.

I need to set him up with one of my other gay friends, but whom? I’ll figure it out, I always do.

Right now, life is a rollercoaster. My professional life is sweet. I’m stoked about working with Joss, I’m always ready to ‘Bring It;’ and yeah, I have to use that pun whenever I can, I’d imagine Kiki uses it too. Which reminds me, I should get in touch with her, it’s been too fuckin’ long.

I’m very plan type gal when it comes to work, but in my personal I’m a fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants kinda gal. I like to make it up as I go along. I like working and playing hard. But all work and no play makes Eliza a very unhappy girl

The breeze cool on her bronze skin; Eliza sighed turning over as the sun beat down with wayward fingers in an attempt to quell the relief she was feeling from the heat. Falling to the side, she toyed with the idea of picking up the script and reading it, instead she lay there enjoying a free day off set. She looked forward to working with Joss again. An errant page chose to play with the wind that was now picking up, the sound lulling Eliza into a peaceful sleep. The salt-air teased her nose, in the distance the sounds of children while over head the lazy seagulls cried in vein attempts to find food.

Nate threw ice at her, she pretended to sleep. Older brothers could be so annoying. Once she leaned up, and stuck her tongue out at him, in the childish way she did when she was little. Honestly she loved her brothers, all of them.