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Sunday, October 24th, 2010
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9:04a
Passed out cold on a queen size bed that is littered with playing cards, a dozen empty Jack Daniels bottles, fifteen donuts boxes that contain nothing but crumbs and a bright orange traffic cone. Big Tobacco had went on a binge of sorts last night. Locking himself in the $5,000 a night hotel room he called room service every fifteen minutes for three hours making a list of demands and while the staff did their best to cater to Mr. Reynolds there were just some things they couldn't do.
Namely find a dodo bird and bake it into a pie.
When he does wake up he rolls over and immediately reaches for the phone again.
[Phone call to Alcohol]
HEY! MAN HATING HE-BITCH! GIMME MY KID BACK.
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