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[11 Jan 2011|01:07pm] |
[Private to Self]
I thought the nightmares would go away, but they haven’t. I think they’re worse now because I know they’re real. Merlin, should I even be writing this here? I don’t feel like anything is safe anymore and I don’t know what to do. Maybe I need to talk to someone about them and everything else. But who? I feel like I can’t trust anyone anymore. Especially since I can see the dullness in their eyes now, and I know what it means. The one person I instinctively want to talk to, I don’t know if I can trust any more. It’s like I don’t know who he is now. But even still… somehow there’s a part of me that still feels connected to him, still wants to go to him. Fuck, I don’t know what to do. Is it even safe? If he wanted to hurt me, he could have done so ages ago… Merlin, T would never-But-Fuck, I’m just going to have to risk it.
[/P]
[Private to T]
Can we talk? I’d say somewhere public but then we might be overheard. My place, I guess. But don’t think about trying anything, I know how to defend myself. And Quaffle will- If you’re free today…
[/P]
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