I hope everyone’s Friday night is amazing. Mine is. And hopefully your morning was like so much better than mine.



So I’m sleeping and I’m sleeping well. I had only been home a couple hours, long enough to shower and smoke and finish the last half of a tv episode. Anyway, having well deserved sleep when at the crack of dawn, no literally guys it was like 7 I am not kidding. Crack of dawn and just this piercing shriek. Now we have a very large house for those of you that don’t know so she was LOUD AS FUCK. This should be really fucking alarming except it was Rachel so i was more pissed I was woken up than anything else. So I roll over and I’m about to go back to sleep when i realize that while I don’t give a shit about her, Mary was prolly here. And her I don’t hate with a fiery passion of 1000 suns, never have. So I call her phone and …

A spider. It was a motherfucking spider. That was what we needed to wake the dead for. I could hear her in the background bitching about exterminators and fuck if I even know. Told Mary to have fun with that and then had to start the smoke, tv , sleep cycle all over again.

So disrespectful, this cunt.