My folks want me home now that they've finally discharged me, and shit, I want to. I haven't been home in two years now, and I'm so close and they don't own my ass anymore. Can't pull "considering your son's powers we feel it would be in his best interests and those of the community if he remained through the summer to continue working on his powers. Interrupting his training could prove detrimental to the control we all believe he is capable of achieving." Yeah, memorized that damned letter. But Josh is still stuck in the fucking hospital and now Julian's coming back and...I don't know what the hell is going to happen anymore. I thought it was going to be straightforward, that by now Josh would have realized that what he wants is Julian, but now everything's fucked and he needs me. If I stay in his room at night he sleeps, if I don't he wakes up having panic attacks and trying to climb, or fucking falling, out of bed. And...maybe he really does still want me. Maybe he's not just holding on out of habit or pity. Or hell, maybe his brain's still scrambled and he just hasn't remembered he wants Julian more yet. But. I can't leave without knowing. I can't walk away until he tells me to, and I sure as fuck can't when he needs me.
When I called administration they said if I accept the offer to come back next year for college they'll let me stay for as much of the summer as I want, just like in SF. And I can still be here for him. And it's not like I can't still back out if he doesn't want me once he remembers. I'm not stupid, I'm not going to accept the offer to be a cadet right now. I'm not qualified, they're just afraid of letting me loose in the general population and if I join the cadets that they own me. Hell, I'm probably not qualified ever for admission to the college, they just want me where they can keep an eye on me for as long as possible, like they're afraid I'm going to go evil or something. But for right now it gets me what I want, more time here until Josh is healed and figures out what he wants.
So it looks like I'm sticking around for the summer, and possibly for next year too.