Jesse Delacroix

Keep walking, and running

And running for miles

Ain't going back to Barton Hollow
Devil gonna follow me e'er I go
Won't do me no good washing in the river
Can't no preacher man save my soul
Miles and miles in my bare feet
Still can't lay me down to sleep
If I die before I wake
I know the Lord my soul won't take

April 2020



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Posts Tagged: 'jayden'

Feb. 1st, 2015


So I was channel-surfing today, and I came across the Lilo & Stitch movie. And I am a sucker for that film, so of course I had to stop and watch it. By the time they got to Stitch being apprehended, I lost it. Tears. Tears everywhere.

And it got me to thinking. So much of life lately has been about darkness and sadness (and not without reason), and I don't think I've really appreciated the things I have lately.

This is my family. Is little, and broken. But still good. Yeah. Still good. )

Jul. 5th, 2014


Adrian left a message on my phone last night, apparently they've found a buyer for the house. Full asking price, too. I called him back this morning, he's going to wire half of it to me. So Jay, we should set you up with a bank account or something.

Now that the house is sold, that's the last thing to be wrapped up in the wake of that man's death. We don't ever have to go back if we don't want to, not that I'd ever planned to anyway. Getting Jay will likely be the last time I was there. And I'm pretty OK with that.

Apr. 16th, 2014


My father is an even more manipulative, controlling bastard than I ever thought. Though I don't know why I'm surprised. Jay's going through Hell, and I can't do anything, and I just want to scream, or crawl into a bottle until I feel better. Which I can't, because you remember what happened last time I drank while on my pain meds.

Aug. 21st, 2013


[Strikes not readable]
Happy birthday to me.

Not going out, because, as previously stated, liquor and my pain pills do not mix. But Jay called, sang happy birthday on my voicemail. So that was nice. And I ordered pizza to celebrate. Look out, I'm going craaaazy.

God, I wish Mom was still alive.

Aug. 5th, 2013


Gonna be 26 in about 2 weeks. It feels like...well, nothing special, really. I'll probably feel differently once I hit 30, but that's still 4 years away. Plenty of time until I have to start making noises about how I'm getting up there.

I feel like Jayden would laugh at me for saying that. Which: fair enough, really. 30 ain't that old.

I seem to have gotten into a habit of posting songs a lot on this thing. And who am I to break tradition?

Mumford and Sons, 'Broken Crown' )

Jun. 22nd, 2013


Jayden called yesterday, told me he got accepted into NYU and Penn State, and pretty much every other place he applied. He's so fucking smart, whatever he wants to do with his life, he's gonna be top-notch. Mama would be real proud of him if she was alive, and I told him so.

He asked me if I ever regretted not going to college. And I told him the truth, which is: yeah, every now and again. I had plans to maybe go to a state school, but that didn't happen. And that's OK, I've made peace with it. I don't think college and I would've meshed anyway.