I wasn't going to put anything else here today because I know I've been super whiny and I hate being whiny but today was just absolutely awful. And just when I thought I couldn't have a worse day, at least relatively speaking, and it just did so now I'm going to rant and be whiny and I don't even care because I feel like shit and I just need to write it all down. I will however cut it so you don't have to read it if you don't want to, because despite me being angry and ranty and whiny, I try to be a good person.
I blame it on the fucking weather. I woke up this morning and the only thing I genuinely wanted was for the morning classes to be canceled. That way I could work on my outline peacefully until I had gym class and then I could go to bed early or some semblance of early for me. But no, my college is run by idiots and despite the fact that we had four inches of snow and about an inch of ice and it was still raining freezing rain, we had school. However, that would have been semi-bearable if the sidewalks were clear, ice free and you know, generally, safe to walk on. But no, why would they do something rational like that? So I had to make my way in the freezing rain over ice and snow in fifteen degree weather only to have my first class end early. So I went and had coffee and had a lovely conversation with the man behind the bar. Then I went to my second class and had that end early. JUST CANCEL THE DAMN CLASS IF YOU'RE NOT GOING TO USE THE WHOLE TIME! DON'T MAKE US COME OUT INT THE STORM! ASSHOLES!
In the workshop I teach things went fine. We got through no problem I think they understand the stuff and we stayed almost the whole time so I didn't feel like a waste of space. Then I had a few hours of peace in which I found out my gym class was canceled and we went to Wal-mart and bought pudding and movies. When I got home, however, things went south. My doctor's nurse called and told me that I needed to come in immediately because my cysts reappeared after three months of being good and also because I was told to cancel my annual which was supposed to be last month. She said that it was likely to be more serious this time around since this has become so chronic and the pain was so bad and extended this time. That boils down to them changing my medication and forcing me into menopause which raises a whole new frame of concern for me. I can't deal with that kind of stress this semester. But at the same time I can't deal with three days of agonizing pain that causes dead leg either.
While I was on the phone with her I got a message from my friend who I was supposed to go to North Carolina with to let me know that her mom's heart surgery got moved to two weeks from today because of the weather, her apartment won't be ready until the middle of March instead of that week which comes down to the trip I was supposed to be taking for Spring Break is now off and I'm out 110 dollars because the assholes that run the airline won't let me change the details of my ticket without charging me an additional 130 dollars.
Now all in all, this wouldn't be such a terrible thing but my mom just called me about ten minutes ago. She asked if I had checked my checking account recently. I said just the other day because I had when I transferred 200 dollars there so I'd have money to spend on things. She then tells me that for some reason my bank ATE MY FUCKING ACCOUNT. So I don't know where 200 dollars of my money is or how the groceries I bought today got paid for or how my bill that's due in a few weeks is going to get paid. Unfortunately, my bank doesn't have twenty four hour customer service phones so I have to wait until tomorrow to get this unfortunate know out of my stomach. Also, my thesis outline is due tomorrow, I have no idea what's going on in my introduction to psychopharmacology class because the professor talks entirely in jargon that I don't understand despite trying to stumble through the textbook and asking him to reexplain it and slow down a little bit and the whiny dumb girl in my biology class beat me on the test that we took last week.
I think I'm done. These past few days made me very aware why I used to write for certain characters. They were a fantastic form of release and let me not turn into the crazy ranting lunatic I was today.