| When I saw you I fell in love, and you smiled because you knew. |
[Sep. 7th, 2010|01:44 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | optimistic | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Never shout never- The lousy truth | ] |
Today I talked to Senni about the whole Eric situation. I told her I want her not to feel guilty for having feelings for Eric and worrying constantly about how I feel - and go out with him. I told her I was upset the first time she talked to him because I still had feelings for him, he was my first boyfriend. She understands and apologized and kept thanking me that I told her this and that she feels so much better. I told her that it was okay because it's not right for me to be selfish and not want her to be happy. They both will be happy if they can be together. You can't help who you have feelings for. Maybe one day I will be in her spot. She didn't know how I was feeling when she first did this. She didn't know the thoughts that ran through my head, so I don't blame her. If she did, I hope things would of been different. But who knows. I just want to start fresh and I want her to be happy. I am over Eric. Someday, I may have a breakdown and miss him (for whatever reason) but hopefully I realize I am being very stupid. Eric is not for me. He can be very cruel to me and sometimes it hurts when he texts me and makes it clear he wants to hangout with me only to do sexual things. I hope he treats Senni differently. Thats all.
The Chloe and Carson situation was pretty bad. I called him and asked him if was true and he said no. Then eventually, he addmitted it but told me not to tell. Saying if I did he'd "slit my throat" and "hate me forever". I still told, and I know I did the right thing. Tori asked if we could still be friends and I said I couldn't answer that right now. I just need space. I'm dissapointed in her and I don't want her in my life right now. Chloe is already talking about taking back Carson which deeply frustrates me and dissapoints me. She is being very foolish. It is way too soon and she is forgetting he CHEATED on her. It's her life though. *Sigh*
School starts on Wednesday. I'm going to be a sophmore :o) Wow. I'm excited to see who's in all my classes. I'm smiling right now. Haha. I hope this is a great year. Please be.
Sam, I'm slacking on your entries. I need to catch up! I'll read them soon <3 |
|
|