Private entry
So today there was a thing. I met a guy, Luke. He's the assistant coach on the kid's soccer team. He's super cute, and nice. Really great with all the kids too. He asked if I wanted to hang out sometime, and I told him yeah. I'm a little nervous it's been forever since I've been out with a guy, but he seems pretty laid back so it should be okay. That aside, I have a six o'clock appointment with Julia Mcgaven tomorrow right after I leave the Velmonts. My dad still thinks it would benefit my mental health if I see a psychiatrist. Yeah, because the last one worked out so well. I'm dealing with Jake's death in my own way and no amount of talking to a shrink is gonna fix what's wrong. It wont bring him back. Ugh, I hate that he died, I miss him so much. Sometimes I feel so angry with him, and other times I'd give anything just to hear his voice again. To laugh with him, hang out and listen to music all night like we used so many times. I miss going to concerts with him. We used to have some good times together. I used to feel sad all the time, but working with the twins, and Madi have really helped me deal better with my struggles. They're awesome kids, and they brighten my days. My days are pretty busy usually I just don't think I need therapy, but my dad worries for me so much. I think he's scared I'm gonna end up like Jake. I guess I can humor him and go to a couple of sessions see how it goes. so not my thing therapy really just kinda blows.