11 June 2007 @ 11:09 am
Never's a Long Time Away.  
Title: Never's a Long Time Away
Timeline: Post-513
Rating: PG-13
Author's Notes: A big thank you to [info]xie_xie_xie for the beta!

Brian leans back against the sofa and takes another drag off the joint. He lets the smoke fill his lungs, and then blows it out slowly, watching it cloud above his head.

Brian closes his eyes. He can see the future, can see how it will all play out.

Justin's calls from New York will start to come less frequently. So will his emails. He'll go from one a day, to one a week, then one a month.

Soon, it'll be months between phone calls. Justin will be busy with new friends, with work, with making a name for himself. He'll call and sound apologetic, distracted, and Brian will know that Justin's only half listening, his mind on other things.

Then he'll meet someone. Someone who will look at him with lust and adoration in his eyes. Justin will fuck him - more than once - and tell himself it doesn't mean anything, that he and Brian have never played by normal rules anyway, and Brian's not exactly being celibate himself so what's the big deal?

The fuck buddy will turn into a friend. They're the same age and they have a lot in common. They're both trying to make it - maybe he's a struggling actor, bussing tables until he makes it on Broadway. Or maybe he's an artist too, and they'll spend hours talking about their favorite painters. He'll understand Justin, he'll love him. And eventually, Justin will love him back. They'll move in together, into some shitty hovel, but they won't care about that because it'll be an adventure, and sure, Justin will always love Brian, but maybe some things just weren't meant to be.

Brian takes another toke. The vision of the next five years swimming in front of his bloodshot eyes. Brian doesn't really believe it, but he also sort of does.

He hears the door slide open and looks up, expecting to see Mikey.

Instead, it's Justin, duffel bag over his shoulder and a grin on his face.

Brian clears his throat. “Hey.”

“Mmm, weed. Gimme some,” says Justin, dropping his bag and climbing up next to Brian on the sofa.

Brian holds up the joint and Justin takes it. “Hey,” he says with a smile, and leans in for a kiss.

“What the fuck are you doing here?” Brian asks. “You've only been gone five minutes.”

“I've been gone ten days, asshole,” Justin laughs. “And I've missed you every fucking minute.”

Brian puffs out a breath. “Pfft. You've probably been so busy you've forgotten all about me.” He only sounds half joking.

“Aww, is poor Brian feeling neglected,” Justin teases him. “Just my luck to come home when you're stoned. You always get so maudlin.”

“Fuck you,” Brian says half-heartedly. “Don't you have important artist-like things to do in the Big Apple?”

“Mmm, I do,” Justin says. He straddles Brian legs and settles his ass down over Brian's groin, rubbing a little. Brian's half hard already.

Justin puts the joint out in the ashtray and then grabs Brian's wrists, trapping them against the sofa.

“But the most important thing I had to do was come home and get fucked. It's good for my creativity,” he says with a grin, and grinds down against Brian's cock again for good measure.

“You can't get fucked in New York?” Brian asks and pushes up against Justin's ass, almost against his will.

“Sure I can,” Justin says grinding in his lap again. Brian's cock has gone from half hard to full mast now. “But not by you,” Justin says, letting go of Brian's wrists and cupping his face instead. “At least, not until you come visit me.”

Justin stares at him for a long moment, throwing down the challenge, and then he presses his mouth against Brian's. Brian's lips are stiff at first, not wanting to yield, but then he opens up for Justin's tongue, wanting it too much, and they both groan at the contact.

Brian runs his hands down Justin's back as they kiss, pulling him in even closer and then grabs Justin's ass, squeezing it tight.

Justin breaks away from the kiss with a gasp. “Hey,” he says again, and Brian throws back his head and laughs.

Justin grins.

“I missed you too,” Brian says.

“Yeah?” Justin asks. “But I bet you've already decided that I'm going to go off on my excellent adventure and forget all about you. Am I right?”

“Possibly,” Brian says, almost embarrassed at how good Justin is at reading his mind.

“Brian,” Justin says, leaning close and nuzzling at Brian's neck.

“Hmm?” Brian asks, moving his head to the side to grant Justin better access.

“I love you,” Justin says between kisses, “and I want you. I have since I was seventeen years old. Do you really think you're ever getting rid of me?” Justin asks, pulling back to look at Brian.

“Because if you don't know that by now, after everything we've been through, maybe you should lay off the drugs because they're clearly warping your mind,” he says with a cheeky smile.

“I'm never getting rid of you, huh?” Brian murmurs. “Never's a long time away. You sure about that?”

“Oh I'm sure,” Justin says. “There's a lot that can be packed into from now to never. I'm looking forward to all of it. And you're going to be part of it too, because I'm sure as fuck not doing this without you.”

Brian bites his lip into his mouth, not sure what to say. Maybe Justin will be better off without him, maybe they should make a clean break of it now.

Justin must see something in his face because he changes tack. “Remember that time you went to Ibiza and would only tell me you had to go do what you had to do?” Justin asks.

“You mean that time I had cancer and was an asshole?”

“Yeah that," Justin grins. "Remember when I said I loved you, and I'd be here when you got back.”

Brian nods.

“I meant it,” Justin says. “And I want you to mean it too, now. Because sure, I want to take my shot at New York, but I want you, too. I always have, and I always will, and I need you to remember that. Can you do that for me Brian?”

Brian's quiet for a moment. “Yes.”

“Yes what?” Justin asks, eyes twinkling.

“Yes, I can do that,” Brian says, kissing Justin again. “You little twat,” he whispers in Justin's ear.

Justin just laughs and kisses him again.
( Post a new comment )
frantic_quest: bj bw inense embrace[info]frantic_quest on January 20th, 2010 05:03 am (UTC)
I adore this. You captured Brian's feelings of unworthiness so perfectly, and had Justin obliterate them in a way only he can.
(Reply) (Thread) (Link)
Britin[info]_alicesprings on January 20th, 2010 05:23 am (UTC)
Aw, well thank you! I have a bit of a love/hate relationship with my fics, but I'm trying to be less hard on myself. So happy you enjoyed it, thank for letting me know!
(Reply) (Parent) (Link)