003 - On death
There is a gravestone in Godric Hollow that reads my name. It took a bit of research, but I managed to find out just where I was buried. Is it morbid of me to want to visit it? I'm not sure if it would bring some sort of closure or make things worse, but knowing it is there is just... I'm not even sure what it makes me feel, but there is just this burning desire to go.

On the other hand, the thought of seeing my name on a tombstone, knowing that there is a body that I am responsible for being there was once mistaken for my own six feet or so beneath my own feet... it is rather terrifying. I'm not sure I could make it through such an ordeal without losing it. I feel so guilty.

Would anyone like to go with me?

[Private]
It only just occurred to me how stupid I was to announce myself alive on these journals. I should've left it go. I shouldn't have come back from Russia. It only just now occurred to me that former Death Eaters can read what I've written here, too. And now I'm trying to act all casual about it. Stupid, Dorcas, really! I might as well dig up that grave and bury myself in it, because I'm going to end up dead sooner rather than later.